The Strawberry and the Beast
by Arigato-Okami
Summary: Soul Society's most dignified Shinigami are forced into putting on a play for everyone, and somehow the 11th Division Captain has snagged the lead. A certain strawberry ends up in the mix. Will love blossom, or will things go wrong? KenIchi. please R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Well, hello all! I found my old writing book laying around, and I just had to post this up. Hope everyone enjoys ;)**

**I do not in any way own Bleach or any of these characters.**

**All of them are copywrite to Kubo-san (Tite Kubo)**

**My playlist for this chapter consisted of: Beethoven's Fifth Symphony **

**Enjoy!**

Kenpachi remembered waking up in a fluster that morning. The reason why? Yachiru had been bouncing on his face, screaming something along the lines of,

"Wake up, Ken-chan~"

He had sat up and she slid down onto his lap.

"What do you want, brat?" He asked.

"Old man wants ta see ya!" She replied jovially.

So, Kenpachi got dressed and attempted to do his hair. [For the sake of this fanfic] He miraculously finished putting the spikes and bells in in under an hour. On his way to the first division, he met up with Unohana, the fourth division Captain.

"Good morning, Zaraki-taicho." She greeted politely.

"Mornin'." He replied gruffly.

Any further conversation consisted of the weather and 'uh-huhs'.

Upon arriving at the First Division, Unohana had kept him from getting lost, Kenpachi realized that something was off. He didn't even know that Old man Yammamoto could smile..._that_ big. Yup, something was defiantely off. Kenpachi groaned and walked to his usual spot among the other Captains, his bells tinkling quietly with each step. Yammamoto began,

"You have all been called here for a reason. The Shinigami Women's and Men's Associations have unanimously agreed to put on a play for the whole of the Seretei. I would like to see it, so that is why I agreed to the production." He scanned the Captains with an ominous glare on his face, " I want _all_ of you to participate. _No questions._ Try-outs are today, in half an hour. I had _better _see _all_ of you there."

The Captains glanced among themselves, they all knew what would happen if any one of them failed to show up

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><p>Kenpachi arrived, yet again, at the first division, accompanied by Ikkaku, Yumichaka and Yachiru.<p>

"Woah!" Ikkaku gaped at the throng of people milling about.

"Lots of people I see. None can compare to the beauty that is I." Yumichaka stated with a flip of his dark hair.

"Look at all the babes!" Ikkaku oogled a pretty young Shinigami girl walking by, failing miserably to stop his nose from turning into a red Niagra Falls. **THWAK!**

"Ikkaku! We are not here to 'sight-see', I _thought_ you knew that," Yumichake growled after hitting Ikkaku over the head with his sheathed Zanpakutō, "You are so unbeautiful."

"Yeah Cue-ball! You're ver _unbeautiful_." Yachiru squealed playfully. She jumped for Ikkaku's head, landing on his shoulders and began chomping mercilessly on his head.

"Ow! Stupid brat!" Ikkaku cussed as he flailed his arms around, trying unsuccessfully to dislodge the crazy, pink haired fuku-taicho from his abused head.

The group arrived at the audition house just after the Captain of the eigth division, Shunsui. Apparently he had ordered Nanao to audition, and she being one to never disobey a(somewhat) decent order, had grudgingly auditioned.

They were walking, rather, Shunsui was running for dear life with Nanao in hot pursuit with a huge booke raised over her head, screaming,

"I'm going to get you, _Taicho_!"

It was rather comical.

Yachiru had stopped biting Ikkaku's head and instead sat on his shoulders watching the royally pissed vice-captain chase her drunken superior around. Zaraki began to walk, in search of the purple audition ten. Wait...tents? He had, in fact just realised, that they were surrounded by tents. Oh well, he would just have to find the purple one.

It was then that a certain strawberry decided that the coast was clear.

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><p>Ichigo had been contacted by Soul Society, being told that since he was a Substitute Shinigami he would have to come and audition for the play that was being put on, no-questions-what-so-ever. (But that weird Soul Reaper with the afro that kept popping up everywhere didn't seem to count..)<p>

Orihime had tagged along too, having been requested by Rangiku. Who, as soon as they arrived, had whisked her away. While walking, the substitute Shinigami had noticed the giant frame of the Eleventh Division Captain. That wasn't good, especially for his health. He had backed away slowly and prayed that if there was a God out there, that he be saved from having to come face to face with him. All he had to do was stay undetect-

"Ichiiii~!" Ichigo cringed as he heard the little squeaky voiced vice-captain as she thundered his way. (Which was an impressive feat, considering her size)

He turned and began to run, only to be stopped by a wall. Fate was a bitch.

"What the crap is a wall doing in the middle of an alley?" He groaned, looking up. Said 'wall' was none other than Kenpachi Zaraki. Ichigo wished he could scream and run, but he was caught like a deer in headlights. Frozen. Oh Shit.

* * *

><p>Kenpachi grinned widely. What a surprise!<p>

"Fight me!"

"Uh, no thanks, I choose life." Kenpachi's eye twitched.

"Remember the paly." Ichigo stood, dusting himself off.

"Fine, _after_ the stupid play?"

"I'll...think about it."

"That's your problem, you think too much."

"Whatever." Ichigo sighed, "Is the old man making you try out too?"

"Yeah." Kenpachi sighed, a rare occurrence, "This is gonna suck."

"Big time." Ichigo started walking along-side the huge man. Both men gave a collective sigh.

"What was that, Zaraki?" A smiling Yammamoto stepped out from the shadow of the purple tent,

"Unenthusiastic as always I see."

Ichigo gulped, smiling and sweating nervously. Kenpachi remained unperturbed.

"N-no, we're both very enthusiastic about this!" Ichigo stuttered.

"Good to know." Yammamoto said, smiling darkly, "I cannot wait to see your auditions."

"Yeah, we were just going." Ichigo grabbed Zaraki's arm and dragged him towards the tent, with difficulty of course.

Once inside, Ichigo breathed a sigh of relief.

"Now to get these dumb.."

"Auditions." Kenpachi finished smartly.

"Yes, _those. _Out of the way."

"They weren't half bad." Ikkaku said, approaching them.

"We already went." Yumichaka added, to which Yachiru, attached to his shoulder, nodded enthusiastically.

Suddenly a voice over a loud speaker called out,

"Next, Kenpachi Zaraki to the stage please."

Said man growled and stepped toward the ominous doorway that led to the stage. What he didnt realise, was that this would change his life. Forever.

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><p><strong>OOH! Im sorry about the cliffhanger...just kidding I'm not. :P<strong>

**Gotta rush with the authors note cause I need to get to bed. :(**

**Please review and let me know what was good and not-so-good. Love you all~ :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey all!**

**Kay, before you kill me for being away all this time.. Look a shiny new chapter! *tosses paper to angry followers* Take the chapter not me! ;A;**

**Anyways, sorry I've been gone so long. My book got thrown away, and thus all the chapters for this fic are now gone. I rewrote this all last night (and I had work in the morning so be grateful!)**

**I graduated high school last summer, and my dad lost his battle to cancer in February of this year (2014). SO a lot has happened, but I think I'm back now :)**

**Hopefully this story will get some attention.**

**Oh! Also, I would like casting suggestions for the characters. Some have been decided already! *ahem* No spoilers! But I really could use some help casting these characters. As you smart readers will learn( and probably already know, you smarty smart pants you), the play is 'Beauty and the Beast'. I thank you in advance for your help with casting! You can send your suggestions via PM or review, your choice!**

**As always, let me know if there are any major mistakes in this chapter, what was good and not-so-good.**

**My playlist for this chapter consisted of **

**-Fairy tail (main theme) /slow version and regular\**

**-Dragon Force - Fairy tail ost**

**-And some others that I don't recall..**

**Anyways.. Enjoy the shiny new chapter and don't kill me please ;A;  
><strong>

* * *

><p>The first thing Kenpachi realized was that the hallway was extremely dark. Now, Kenpachi would never admit it but it made him just a little bit nervous. JUST A LITTLE.<p>

Right. Anyway.

Kenpachi made his way through the poorly lit area – he did not get hung up in the curtains _thankyouverymuch._

Ahem.

Soon he found himself standing on a dimly lit stage staring out into a vast sea of what appeared to be empty chairs.

'Humph. This is stupid. I can't even see.'

"Mr. Zaraki?" Some guy he'd never seen before approached him. Now, some if not many people take Kenpachi for a fool, but he was not. He could be smart when he wanted and needed to be. Of course he noticed how the man seemed unaffected by his inconceivable amount of Spiritual Pressure. This was odd..

"Whaddya want?" He grumbled, his mood quickly going sour. Too much thinking today and not enough fighting.

"A script for you, sir."

"And just what the hell am I supposed to do with this?" Kenpachi asked – not the least bit curious.. okay maybe a little – whilst waving the papers in the other man's face.

"Just follow the instructions given to you over the intercom." Was the other soul reaper's response. "Good luck Mr. Zaraki."

And with a bow, the man was gone, leaving Kenpachi alone on the dark stage.

That didn't last long.

Suddenly, the brightest light he had ever seen shone down on him – momentarily blinding his uncovered eye.

"Kenpachi Zaraki, good to see you finally show up for your audition. I was beginning to worry I'd have to come find you." The voice of the Head Captain echoed around the room.

"Let's just get this over with." Kenpachi rumbled, barely resisting the urge to tear this place down.

"Yes, yes. Of course." The old man was seriously getting to him now. "Turn to page 43 of your script please."

Thankfully, it really didn't take long for him to find the page.

"Found it."

"Good." Old man Yama sounded pleased. "Now, you'll be reading the part of 'Beast'. I will read Belle's lines. Alright?"

"Yeah, sure." Though inwardly, Kenpachi was intrigued by this character.. 'Beast'. He wondered if perhaps this play might not be as lame as he had previously thought.

"Then let's begin."

Old man Yama began reading the script.

**"Here now. Oh don't do that. Just.. hold still."**

Kenpachi saw it was his turn and with barely an ounce of enthusiasm exclaimed,

**"That hurts!"**

** "If you'd hold still, it wouldn't hurt so much!"**

Without realizing it, Kenpachi started to get into this role as the rather angry 'Beast'. A fight is a fight, verbal or physical, am I right? It was definitely better than nothing, though none of this passed through his mind.

**"Well, if you hadn't run away, this wouldn't have happened." **He growled in exasperation.

**"Well if you hadn't frightened me, I wouldn't have run away!"**

Kenpachi paused, character momentarily broken. This.. 'Belle' had a point. He had to glance at the paper. How would Beast respond?

**"Well you shouldn't have been in the West Wing!"** He finally countered.

**"Well you should learn to control your temper!"**

And that was that. Kenpachi could not for the life of him think of a good enough comeback. He snapped back to reality when he heard Old man Yama.

"Well done Kenpachi!"

Wait.. WHAT did he say?

"That will be all! Thank you for your time!"

And so, Kenpachi was lead off the now dark stage. He stepped into the waiting room in a complete daze.

He couldn't quite say whether he was proud of himself or seriously pissed off.

And to Zaraki..

That was not a good thing.

He decided immediately that his strawberry could help him decide!

..In battle of course.

* * *

><p>'Ugh! How the hell did I get dragged into this? I am just a substitute soul reaper.." Ichigo thought dejectedly to himself. 'I mean.. Come on!'<p>

A voice he didn't quite recognize called him in to audition just as Kenpachi stepped out.

'At least I don't have to deal with him right now..'

And so Ichigo stumbled around in the dark, attempting to find the stage just as Kenpachi had.

Once he'd gotten up there with the light blinding him though.. Ichigo lost his cool composure. He became extremely flustered. Though no one could have seen it on the outside – other than the light sheen of sweat on his brow – inside Ichigo was lost and beginning to panic.

'This can all go to hell!' He thought desperately.

Finally.. It was over.

"Well done, Ichigo Kurosaki." The voice said. Ichigo vaguely wondered if the voice was being sarcastic or truthful… Honestly he didn't care. He wanted out.. NOW. He turned to leave.

"Don't forget to check the listings tomorrow at 6 P.M." The voice reminded him. Ichigo didn't bother to thank him and booked it out of there like his pants were on fire.

* * *

><p>"I definitely don't want a part in all this." Ichigo grumbled. His red haired friend Renji downed his drink in one gulp.<p>

"I dunno. It could be fun." He said.

"Are you for real?!" Ichigo facepalmed. Renji shrugged.

"I'm just sayin'." Then he smirked devilishly. "And maybe you'll get to spend time with your 'special someone'."  
>"What?!"<p>

"You know, a certain cap-" Ichigo punched him hard in the face to shut him up, his own face lighting up like a Christmas tree.

* * *

><p><strong>Horizontal rules... Horizontal rules everywhere! :O<strong>

**What was Renji going to say?! ;D**

**I think we all know though.**

**Kenpachi: Know what?**

**A-O: NOTHING! *slams door in his face***

**Ahem.**

**Hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Let me know if you have any suggestions for me and don't be shy! I won't slam the door in your face C:**

**See you later!**


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